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Cat Piss. Yeah, that’s really the name. If you’ve never heard of it, you’d probably think it’s a joke—or a warning. But nah, it’s a legit cannabis strain, and the seeds? Coveted. Rare. Weirdly beautiful. The name’s not just for shock value either. Crack open a nug, and there it is—that sharp, ammonia-tinted funk that hits your nose like a slap. Not for the faint-hearted. Or the scent-sensitive.
I remember the first time I ran into it. Some crusty old grower in Humboldt handed me a jar and said, “Don’t judge it till you smoke it.” I did. And holy hell—it was electric. Like someone plugged my brain into a neon sign and left it buzzing. Sativa-dominant, obviously. You don’t get that kind of mental launch from anything couch-locky. It’s not a chill-on-the-couch-and-watch-nature-docs strain. It’s a clean-the-garage-at-2am kind of high. Jittery, maybe, if you’re not used to it. But if you are? Euphoric. Focused. A little manic, in the best way.
The seeds are a different story. Hard to find. Like, unicorn-level rare. Most of what’s floating around now is either a clone-only cut or some backcrossed version someone’s been hoarding in a freezer since the early 2000s. The original Cat Piss is supposedly a phenotype of Super Silver Haze—though, honestly, no one seems to know for sure. It’s got that Haze-y backbone, sure, but there’s something else in there. Something feral. Almost chemical. Like it evolved in a gas station bathroom and decided to become a plant.
Growing it? Not for beginners. It stretches like crazy during flower—like, double or triple in size if you’re not careful. You’ll need to train it, bend it, maybe even curse at it. But the payoff? Long, lanky colas that reek so bad your neighbors might call animal control. And the high. Goddamn. It’s like your brain is a pinball machine and someone just hit multiball. Not always pleasant. But unforgettable.
Some people hate it. Say it’s too sharp, too weird, too much. Fair. It’s not a crowd-pleaser. It’s not Gelato or Wedding Cake or whatever dessert strain is trending this week. Cat Piss is punk rock. It’s loud, messy, unapologetic. It doesn’t care if you like it. It just is.
And that’s kind of the charm, right? In a world full of polished, Instagram-ready weed, Cat Piss is the stinky, wiry misfit in the corner, flipping the bird and laughing at your terp chart. If you can find the seeds—and good luck with that—grow it. Or don’t. But don’t pretend you’re not curious.
Because once you’ve smelled it, you never really forget.